Speed (1994) - Review

Director: Jan de Bont

Cast: Keanu Reeves, Dennis Hopper, Sandra Bullock, Joe Morton

Country: United States

Rating: R

Run Time: 115 min

Most Die Hard rip-offs are enjoyable in how they inhabit the shell of the Die Hard plot whilst offering up new settings and interesting action sequences. Under Siege offers up Steven Seagal's Aikido styled action on a battleship, Sudden Death places Jean Claude Van Damme and his charisma into a hockey arena, Air Force One makes Harrison Ford the President of the United States while upon a plane, and Olympus Has Fallen reverses the situation by making Gerard Butler a Secret Serviceman while inside of the White House. Although all of these movies are rip-offs of one of the all time great action films, they are still fun to watch for how shallow and entertaining they are. The key differences that set apart the rip-offs from Die Hard itself is their lack of interesting characters, failure to focus on story over plot, and an all around lack of tension or suspense. You don't watch Under Siege or Sudden Death to see if Seagal or Van Damme are going to stop the terrorists, you watch them simply to see how they take out the terrorists. Therefore, both the filmmakers and the viewers engage in a guilty relationship in which both know they are neither going to recreate, duplicate, or experience the successes of John McTiernan's masterpiece.

That being said, I think that Speed might by the only Die Hard rip-off that transcends its sub-genre and influences to the point where it nearly matches Die Hard for all of its action sensibilities, high tension, engaging romance, and memorable characters. Although I would not go as far as to say that Speed is as good or better than Die Hard, as Keanu Reeve's Jack Traven is no John McClane, just about every element of Speed matches Die Hard on a pure visceral and entertainment level. Speed not only certified Keanu Reeves' place in the halls of action cinema, but it also introduced director Jan de Bont to American audiences and certified Sandra Bullock as a movie star in her own right. With over $300 million worldwide and two Academy Awards under its belt, Speed is the perfect success story in every way possible. And it's a rip-off, sort of.

Not the best way to start off a shift.

Although I am not a fan of plot, as character should always drive story, Speed has one of the all time great movie plots. Jack Traven (Keanu Reeves), an L.A.P.D. Officer, picks a bone with psychopathic ex-cop, Howard Payne (Dennis Hopper), when he stops him from blowing up an elevator full of people and prevents him from receiving his ransom money. Although Traven believes the ordeal to be over, his partner, Harry Temple (Jeff Daniels), believes that Payne will strike back again. Payne decides to engage in a game with Traven the next day when he calls him and informs him that a bus on the freeway is in danger of blowing up. The game: once the bus goes over 50 miles per hour, the bomb is armed. If the bus goes under 50 miles per hour, the bomb will blow. And if anyone tries to get off of the bus, it will blow. Once Traven makes his way onto the moving bus full of people, he and Annie Porter (Sandra Bullock), an adorable citizen turned bus driver, do their best to keep everyone calm and communicate with the police in order to keep the bus moving at all times and to get Payne his ransom money. It's non-stop action for two hours. You literally could not ask for more as an action fan.

At the time of its release, Speed heralded the arrival of the hottest new voice in action cinema. De Bont, who had been a cinematographer for decades, had strong experience in the film business before tackling Speed. He had previously photographed such action films as Die Hard, Lethal Weapon 3, Black Rain, The Hunt for Red October, and Total Recall. With such quality films like those under his belt, it only makes sense that De Bont knocked Speed out of the park with excellent direction that even the likes of his fellow compadres John McTiernan and Paul Veerhoven would tip their hats too. De Bont showcases incredible directorial abilities here, crafting both inherent tension, exciting action, and engaging romance all within the same picture. It's hard to believe that this is the same director whose career would end as soon as it began, but de Bont's direction for Speed is still exemplary and outstanding, especially for a debut filmmaker.

After the success of Speed, De Bont directed Twister, another hugely successful action/disaster film that certified his action dominance. Unfortunately, De Bont's directorial career ended just as quickly as it begun, as he immediately ruined his career with 1997's Speed 2: Cruise Control, one of the worst reviewed films in cinematic history. Failure after failure followed, as De Bont went on to direct similarly cheesy films such as The Haunting and Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life. 

De Bont has to yet to direct another film since 2003, which might as well confirm his departure from blockbuster cinema once and for all. While it's a shame that de Bont's career ended early, I find his career very interesting. If it weren't for Speed 2, de Bont easily could have gone on to become a major A-list director. One could even compare de Bont's minor success to other Dutch filmmaker Paul Veerhoven, whose most successful films, RoboCop, Total Recall, and Starship Troopers, are still considered to be some of the greatest of the action genre, while the rest of his career is lukewarm and forgettable. It's no coincidence that both of these Dutch filmmakers collaborated on Basic Instinct and Total Recall, as each had a unique vision at the time that seemed to flourish in the Hollywood of the early 1990s. And while we're on the subject of foreign filmmakers turned Hollywood directors, how can de Bont be put into director's jail after all of these years, but Finnish director Renny Harlin is still allowed to make whatever action film he wants? Have you guys seen The Covenant or The Legend of Hercules? I rest my case.

Reeves brings the chops to one of his greatest action films.

According to screenwriter Graham Yost, Speed's plot was meant to be an amalgamation of Silver Streak and Runaway Train, but with the high tension of a Die Hard picture. There's no denying it, few movie plots are as exciting and thrilling as one about a runaway vehicle that cannot be stopped, lest it explode. While Speed may be his calling card, Yost would eventually go on to write other big concept blockbusters involving terrorists, bombs, and Die Hard centric plots like John Woo's underrated Broken Arrow and the waterlogged Hard Rain. However, his Speed screenplay is made all the better because of the witty repertoire courtesy of cult favorite Joss Whedon (Firefly, The Avengers). Whedon was apparently responsible for 95% of the dialog according to Yost, as Yost felt that Whedon knew how to write dialog better than him. Therefore, Speed's excellent script can be chocked up to both Whedon, who knew how to write characters, and Yost, who knew how to place said characters into an exciting situation.

All of Whedon's witty dialog and Yost's tense situations play off of the page as well as they do because of the film's stellar cast. Reeves plays Jack Traven, a John McClane type police officer who puts his life on the line for the innocent people of Los Angeles. Although Reeves had previously shown his action chops in Kathryn Bigelow's Point Break, he shows great stride here as a far more intense and confident action hero that showcases his best acting abilities. Much like McClane, Traven takes a lot of pain and physical suffering throughout the picture, thereby making him a much more relatable and cheer worthy protagonist. It's a real treat to watch a likable hero constantly overcome hurdles, as it makes the viewing experience all the more tense and excitable. Reeves may not be one of the greatest actors on the planet, but his stalwart dedication and professionalism within his performances has proven him time and time again as one of the screen's greatest action heroes.

The other pair of lead performances from Hopper as the film's psychotic mad man and Bullock as the funny and adorable bus driver are also stellar. Hopper's Payne engages in a great revenge rivalry with Traven that makes his villain all the more fun to hate. It's easily Hopper's best villain performance this side of the 90s. Bullock gives a star making performance here, exploding off the screen with a great repertoire with Reeves. Even the smaller supporting performances shine, especially from Jeff Daniels and Joe Morton (T2, Executive Decision) as Traven's fellow officers. 

"You actually paid to see the Super Mario Bros Movie?"

And of course, who can forget all of the passengers on the buss, who become memorable players in their own right. Yost and de Bont place a great emphasis on the interactions between these smaller supporting characters and the police in order to drum up a great sense of community throughout the picture. You'll find yourself cheering along with the passengers for every small victory they achieve, whether it be in the form of them making a tight turn or jumping an impossible gap. If you ever need your faith restored in humanity through an action film, pop on Speed, as well as Die Hard With a Vengeance for good measure.

Speed has the characters, the script, and the plot to hook any cinema goer, but the whole thing comes together thanks to its exhilarating cinematic style. One of the most over used lines to describe a good action film is, "It's a non-stop thrill ride!" While that is rarely the case, as many action films take lengthy breaks in between suspenseful sequences, Speed is truly a non-stop thrill ride in every sense of the phrase. There are a whopping two scenes of breather in between each major action plot, thereby making the entire experience as action packed as they come. 

For a film with almost no shootouts, no henchmen, one villain, and a minimal body count, Speed is still more exciting and bad ass than most Die Hard rip-offs. De Bont extracts as much action and tension as possible out of the film in order to make up for the lack of superficial action entertainment that one would find in most action films. Examples include Reeves trying to get onto the bus while on a busy freeway, a criminal shooting the bus driver which causes Bullock to take over, ramming the bus into parked cars, moving everyone to a side of the bus in order to make a tight turn, and forcing the bus into a situation where it must jump a ridiculous gap that no vehicle could make. All of these tense moments are made all the greater thanks to composer Marc Mancina's excellent score, the one key ingredient that even Die Hard itself is missing. You'll have this score stuck in your head for days after watching the film, and most likely while you are driving down the road.

How about that second date?

At the beginning of this review, I stated that Speed is the best of the Die Hard rip-offs because it's only partially a rip-off. While the main bus plot may resemble Die Hard beat for beat, the initial elevator hostage situation and closing subway train face off prove that there is more than just an exploding bus plot at the center of this film. Speed has three movies worth of entertainment within it, and two of these three movie plots are merely bookends. If you take into account the romantic sub-plot as well, Speed offers up more entertainment than ten films combined, and it's merely two hours long. 

Rediscovering Speed after all of these years has been a real pleasure, as the film should be mentioned alongside the grandest of action pictures from the 90s more often. My theory for the film's minimal discussion is most likely due to its lack of old fashioned action tropes (i.e. muscled bound hero, big guns, massive body count, etc). However, Speed more than makes up for said tropes with the key elements that make up a great film nonetheless, such as an engaging plot, memorable characters, and fantastic action sequences. 

Rating: 10/10 - A stupendous summer blockbuster that proves that small scaled plots with inherent tension will always be more exciting than any grand scaled epic.

Franchise:

Speed (Jan de Bont, 1994)

Speed 2: Cruise Control (Jan de Bont, 1997)

London Has Fallen (2016) - Theatrical Review

Director: Babak Najafi

Cast: Gerard Butler, Aaron Eckhart, Morgan Freeman, Angela Basset, Radha Mitchell

Country: United States

Rating: R

Run Time: 99 min

London Has Fallen is the sequel to Antoine Fuqua's Olympus Has Fallen, a Die Hard rip-off from 2013 with some of the worst special effects in Hollywood history. I figured that I would give my own mini-review of the film before I dive into its sequel in order to give you all a contextual understanding of the series and my opinion of it thus far. While I have no qualms with a film being a Die Hard rip-off, it's one of contemporary action's greatest traditions (i.e. Under Siege, Speed, Sudden Death, Passenger 57, Air Force One, Paul Blart: Mall Cop), I had major issues with Olympus Has Fallen's brutal depiction of the North Korean's attack on Washington D.C. Interestingly enough, Olympus Has Fallen proves Die Hard director John McTiernan's point that no viewer will have fun watching a movie where terrorists murder countless innocents.  Oops, looks like Fuqua skipped out on that lesson of Action Filmmaking 101. I was also immensely disturbed by the first film's treatment towards its characters, as several of the President's cabinet members are brutally mauled and tortured in an unnecessarily malicious matter. All in all though, if Olympus Has Fallen had been directed more competently and lighter on the horrid terrorist violence, than it could have been a fun but brutal take on the Die Hard formula for a new age. That concludes my mini-review for the first film, now on to the sequel.

The sequel, which now takes the political carnage from Washington D.C. to London, is not nearly as brutal or mean spirited as its predecessor, although it is far more malicious in its jingoism. The special effects may be slightly better and the action competently shot, but London Has Fallen is just as meat headed as its predecessor, and proof that this series is surviving simply on box office dollars, not stalwart storytelling. All in all, the action fanatic in me wants to see this series continue on simply to bask in its B-movie simplicity, but the human side of me wants it to end in order to eradicate the jingoism put forth by its story and setting. It's just a shame that this one wasn't called, "London Bridge is Falling Down," or that nobody said it in the movie.

Here we go again.

Since the events of Olympus Has Fallen, Secret Serviceman Mike Banning (Gerard Butler) and President Benjamin Asher (Aaron Eckhart) are buddies again. Elsewhere in the world, the British Prime Minister passes in his sleep, thereby leading to a gathering of the Western world's leaders in London for the funeral. Banning, accompanied by Lynne Jacobs (Angela Bassett), the Director of the Secret Service, join the President on his trip to London. In order to ensure their protection on such short notice, Banning moves up their schedule in order to get them to the funeral far ahead of time. However, disaster strikes when all of the world's leaders are simultaneously killed by terrorist leader Aamir Barkawi in London at various locations. Due to Banning's protective strategy, he and the President survive the attack. After further surviving a downed helicopter, the two make their way through the streets of London in search of rescue all the while fighting off Barkawi's men. It's a classic case of, "How could the same thing happen to the same guy twice?" in a sequel that diverts from the Die Hard formula in favor of a disaster/survival plot.*

The biggest issue with London Has Fallen is not that its special effects suck, but that it bases its plot around a terrorist attack all too real in today's day and age of terrorist threats while also trying to be intensely patriotic. When I initially reviewed Stuart Baird's Executive Decision, a fantastic suspense thriller from 1996, I commented that the film could never be made today because its plot would never fly as an entertaining blockbuster in a post 9/11 world. Nowadays, suspense thrillers based around terrorist bombings and real world threats have to be respectful and serious along the lines of Paul Greengrass' cinema or Zero Dark Thirty, foregoing blockbuster pleasures for a more docudrama like take on the matter. 

Unfortunately, London Has Fallen completely disregards this sense of respect altogether and shoots purely for blockbuster pleasures. It's a bold move, albeit one made all the bolder based on its shamelessness. If that wasn't enough to damn the picture, the intense jingoism, especially in the form of both Butler and Freeman's speeches on America towards the end of the film, clashes with the blockbuster sentiments of the picture. Here we have an action film that tries to send a message about American patriotism, but also deliver blockbuster entertainment in the form of Gerard Butler gunning down countless Arab terrorists. Call me crazy, but I don't think that either of those messages or tones can blend with one another in a realistic matter, especially in a film where Butler utters lines like, "Go back to f***headistan or wherever you guys come from!" London Has Fallen is exactly the kind of action film that came out at the end of the 80s in America when some filmmakers were still hung up on demonizing the Russians (i.e. Rambo: First Blood Part II, Rambo III), but less sensitive to the times and more hard headed. Therefore, meat headed right wingers who like politics mixed in with their violence will go nuts for this film.

The world's most lethal secret serviceman is back.

All politics aside, London Has Fallen follows in the footsteps of its predecessor by coming off immensely cheap despite its rather large budget of $60 million. Although the sequel desperately desires to be a blockbuster, signs of DTV cinema creep in to the picture and drag it down to the depths of action movie hell. For example, an exchange early on in the film between Freeman and Butler's characters was clearly never filmed in the same room. Therefore, director Babak Najafi opts for a shot/reverse shot of the conversation. This shameful scene is made all the more cringeworthy when a body double who is supposed to be "Freeman" walks away from Butler with his back towards the camera. Some research will reveal that Butler shot many of his scenes separate from most of the actors in the film besides Eckhart. This is why so many of the film's other notable character actors appear in a room away from the action or off screen. Regardless, London Has Fallen takes some obvious tips out of the Steven Seagal playbook on lazy filmmaking.

However, the DTV shoddiness doesn't stop there. Hilarious stock footage and freeze frames of exterior buildings abound throughout the picture. I nearly laughed out loud during my screening when the film cut to stock footage of motorcycles cruising through the streets of London that looked as if it were pulled from a news broadcast. The most heinous moment of stock imagery can be spotted in a shot where a still image of the White House is shown as an exterior and the "camera" zooms in on it. If you look carefully enough, you can spot a dark security guard who doesn't move at all during this zoom. Later on in the film, stock footage of Time Square and other cities is used in order to show the President's near assassination on the live screens within the footage. However, if you look at the people walking around the cities, none of them react to the massive image of the President on their screens! Anybody who declares London Has Fallen a solid action picture needs to check their I.Q., because low budget atrocities like these permeate the entire experience and ruin what should have been a more professionally made theatrical release.

From an action stand point, the sequel is a huge step up from its predecessor, especially in its second half. Unfortunately, the first half of the film, which is where it most desperately wishes to be a blockbuster, crumbles due to poor framing and awful computer generated effects. The entire inciting incident, and the ensuing helicopter chase, is so poorly rendered and shot that it begs to be seen purely for laughs. Fortunately, the action becomes much better in the second half as the fights and shootouts are scaled down and brought to a more personal and manageable scale considering the budget at hand. In all honesty, there is some very solid action during the second half of the film, as Butler's Secret Servicemen kicks major butt during some solid shootouts that feature some good stunt work and cinematography. I lost count, but I'll take a guess that that Butler kills a whopping 60 or so Arabs in this film.

The easiest acting job that Freeman could ask for.

With the release of last month's Gods of Egypt and now this, Butler has officially sunk to the level of B-movie star and joined the ranks of Seagal and Van Damme at the end of their own theatrical careers. After nearly ten years since the release of his break out film, 300, Butler has done nothing but coast on mediocre scripts and generic actioners for almost a decade. I for one declare that his A-list label be torn from his name sake and tossed to the dirt. That being said, Butler still does a solid job with the action sequences, and imbues a certain sense of fun with the character of Mike Banning. Banning is a combination of Under Siege's unstoppable Casey Ryback and Rambo III's intensely patriotic John Rambo rolled up into make shift action star. He's far from original, and in no way deep, but he gets the job done, especially while everyone else sleep walks through the picture.

While it must have been fun to see such an extraordinary cast in a B-picture like Olympus Has Fallen the first time, its simply embarrassing to see them all here again and working with worse material than before. The surprisingly impressive supporting cast of Morgan Freeman, Melissa Leo, Jackie Earle Haley, Angela Bassett, Radha Mitchell, and Robert Forster is simply shocking. Every single one of these actors has given far better work within far greater films, and yet here they all are embodying some of the flattest characters imaginable. Freeman, one of the more legendary actors still working today, deserves to have his feet held to the fire for his performance in this film. He barely does anything other than sit in a chair amongst his cabinet members and talk to a giant screen. The many terrorist negotiation scenes strongly resemble the ones found within Seagal's Under Siege series. You know your sequel to a Die Hard rip-off sucks when you can't even top Under Siege 2: Dark Territory, another sequel to another Die Hard rip-off, for goodness sakes. 

Butler and Eckhart run from their critics.

A ridiculous sequel like London Has Fallen should be fun to watch, much the same way that Under Siege 2: Dark Territory, Taken 2, Predator 2, Transporter 2, and Death Wish 2 were to their own series of ridiculous violence and ludicrous action. Unfortunately, the mean spirited tone and intense jingoism holds the sequel back from fulfilling its entertainment duties, which is more or less what a blockbuster of such nature should do. Najafi does a fine job taking over for Fuqua, who is more or less a sleepwalk director for hire anyways. However, it seems that Najafi does nothing more than join the ranks of another foreign director turned blockbuster director, Jose Padilla of RoboCop fame, with a lousy studio film that fails to showcase its director's talents. Only time will tell if another city gets destroyed in another "*Insert City Name Here* Has Fallen" film. Let's just hope that the special effects are more convincing than the ones found here. While die hard action fans may get a kick out of the film, as I temporarily did during its action sequences, London Has Fallen is mostly a dreary picture that is also mercifully short. Expect this one to land on the list of the worst action films of 2016 at the end of the year.

Rating: 4/10 - Mediocre action and disparate tones result in a haphazard sequel that is somewhat greater than its predecessor, but not by much.

*I've retroactively realized that although London Has Fallen does not resemble Die Hard, it does in fact closely resemble Die Hard With a Vengeance with its terrorist bombings, city centric plot, and buddies on the run repertoire. So, I guess it still is a Die Hard rip-off. Here's to originality.

Franchise:

Olympus Has Fallen (Antoine Fuqua, 2013)

London Has Fallen (Babak Najafi, 2016)

Under Siege 2: Dark Territory (1995)

Director: Geoff Murphy

Cast: Steven Seagal, Katherine Heigl, Eric Bogosian, Everett McGill, Morris Chestnut

Country: United States

Rating: R

Run Time: 100 minutes

Seagal was on top of the world with 1992's Under Siege. Both his most financially and critically successful film, Under Siege helped catapult Seagal to "A" list action stardom. Unlike most action stars, Seagal chose to follow up his typical blockbuster with a not so typical environmental action film titled On Deadly Ground. Dubbed "the Seagliest of the Seagal films", On Deadly Ground was a flop for both critics and general audiences. It seemed that audiences just wanted to see some more straightforward Seagal action without any of his own personal environmental themes and agendas getting in the way of the narrative (I have not seen the film so I cannot express my opinion). Therefore, Seagal came back to typical blockbuster action filmmaking with Under Siege 2: Dark Territory! 

The scowl of death.

Under Siege 2 plops Casey in yet another "Die Hard" situation but on a train instead of a ship. The film starts by showing us that some satellite that can shoot lasers has been completed and fully weaponized. The movie than jumps to Casey's story (yeah, who cares about some laser). His brother recently passed away and now he has to take a train to the funeral. He also has to reconcile with his niece (a young Katherine Heigl) on the train too. However, there isn't much time for reconciliation because a butt load of terrorists led by Travis Dane (Eric Bogosian) and Penn (Everett McGill) take over the train as easy as pie. Their reasons: they wish to get the pass codes for that space laser from two of the train's passengers and also want to use the train as their own personal base. The terrorists start taking money from various people around the globe in exchange for lasering whatever they want. Even though this sounds like an easy way to make money, they don't realize that Casey Ryback is on that train! The terrorists stand no chance as Seagal is once again "under siege" and as awesome as ever.

I was kind of harsh on the first Under Siege and said that it was a suspense-less Die Hard rip off. After having watched how lousy Die Hard 2 was in the freakin' series that started it all, I realized that the Under Siege films aren't as bad as I thought they were. I guess you could say I kind of loosened up for this film and had a bit more fun with it. It's also just more fun regardless of my realization. The film takes place on a train and makes for more exciting and unique opportunities for action, the bad guys control a laser in space from the train, and all of the villain actors look like they are having a blast. The plot is so absurd and the villains are so over the top that I couldn't help but embrace the film's silliness. Seagal's bloody trademark action also helps make the film that much more entertaining.

Katherine Heigl had to start somewhere.

One of my favorite things about this film was its fun setting. A double decker train (if that's even a word) makes for a great action film. Seagal gets to climb on the outside of it, kick people out of doors, and even make use of the bar's ingredients for a home made bomb. It just doesn't get any better than that. One of my favorite stunts involves Casey Ryback getting separated from the train. In order to get back on, he finds a Jeep and drives the thing on a dirt road above the train. He aims the car at the train, leaps out, and rolls down the hill as the Jeep flies over the train. Seagal than does one final jump on to the train and bam! Easy as pie. But in all seriousness, I think that we need more action films set entirely on trains. The only other films I think of off of the top of my head that take place on trains are horror films: Terror Train and Snakes on a Train. And no I have not seen Snakes on a Train but I do know about it.

As soon as I popped in this film, I was immediately taken aback by how good the score was. I did not remember any of the music in the original Under Siege being any good. But this film's score was surprisingly very good! I think being composed by Basil Poledouris (RoboCop, Conan the Barbarian, Starship Troopers) is always a big help. I just wanted to point this out though because I was not expecting a Seagal film to have a memorable film score.

The filmmakers were clearly having a lot of fun in the action department with this film. My favorite kill occurs when Seagal dumps lighter fluid down a staircase. When a terrorist runs down the staircase, Seagal blasts the guy with a flare gun! He falls down onto the lighter fluid and bursts into flames! But Seagal isn't finished with that guy yet. Seagal than kicks the dude out the door and off of the train to his death! Another awesome stunt occurs when Seagal breaks a dude's neck and than tosses him off of the train right into a wooden out house! It's an awesome stunt done completely with practical effects and a stuntman. They don't get better than that if you ask me.

"Assumption is the mother of all f*** ups."

I think I liked the villains in this film far more than the first film. While the actors aren't as well known as Tommy Lee Jones and Gary Busey, they both match and surpass each of those actors' craziness. Bogosian chews the scenery up like a thick piece of beef jerky. He clearly had the time of his life with this role and makes for an entertaining villain. Everett McGill is great as the memorable right hand man Penn. He is built up the entire picture as an unstoppable villain who wants to kill Casey Ryback more than anything for messing up their plan. We eventually get the sweet face off between the two near the end of the film. While I wasn't crazy in love with their fight (it contains corny sped up footage), the build up was excellent and Poledouris' music brought it all home for me.

Katherine Heigl isn't half bad as Ryback's niece. She's no Ellen Ripley, but she's not bad. The worst character in the whole film is Bobby the porter (Morris Chestnut). Man, talk about an annoying character! Bobby is a cocky train porter who gets roped up into the action with Seagal. He spends the whole movie shouting, "Aw man I don't wanna die!" or "Hell yeah, I've got a gun!" He even kills like three or four people in the movie! This is a guy who has no training and yet he kills professionally trained terrorists. Sigh. 

The great Jonathan Banks (Breaking Bad) also graces us with his presence for a few moments. It's worth mentioning that in one of the final Breaking Bad episodes, "Freight", Jonathan Banks's character helps Walt steal liquid from a train in the desert. The episode was originally titled "Dark Territory" as a reference to this film where Jonathan Banks also stops a train. What an awesome action movie reference, am I right?!

"Nobody beats me in the kitchen!"

Under Siege 2 is easily one of the most dated action films I have ever watched. And that's not just because Steven Seagal is the star of a multi-million dollar blockbuster picture, oh no. It's because of the terrible green screen effects. I'm sorry, but any time a character stands in front of an open door or a window, the background is obviously a green screen. It's a shame because there is some awesome practical explosions and model work here too that shows why the 90's was so great. But these effect shots are painfully obvious. They pulled me right out of the movie whenever they popped up.

I really loved a lot of the little touches they put into this film. My favorite one is Casey's big reveal. He steps out of a car and whips around to the sound of a score spike. I wish I could have been in the theater back in 1995 to see audiences shout, "Yeah! Casey!" I also love that we get to see Casey cook down in the train's kitchen. Man, this cook cannot get away from a kitchen for the life of him! Casey even mentions that he is writing a memoir while on the train. The villains eventually get ahold of it and we the audience see that the first chapter is titled: "Don't be a hero." I don't know what's up with that title because Casey is the definition of an average person turned super hero.

Check out that Seagal kick on top of the train!

The only thing I have to say is...where is Under Siege 3?! I would love to see Casey Ryback defend another form of transportation from evil terrorists. But alas, Seagal is most likely never going to return to this character. Unlike most action stars, Seagal doesn't care about relying on old characters to revive his career. It seems that reviving the character of Casey Ryback in Under Siege 2 was a one time thing for Seagal. I'm certain that if he had made an Under Siege 3 that he would have landed big box office dollars. Under Siege 2 was made for $60 million and still made $100 million even after On Deadly Ground flopped hard.

Under Siege 2: Dark Territory is dumb fun at its finest. Seagal is really entertaining as the lead here and I love that he wears all black. Casey Ryback is an awesome action character and it's a shame that he only starred in two films. The villains in this flick are highly entertaining too.  The annoying porter character and the lousy green screen shots might distance some people from this film entirely. However, I think that Under Siege 2 is a solid sequel that does not go bigger or crazier than the first. I would argue that the film is on an equal playing field with the first film even though they both take place in completely different settings.

Rating: 7/10 - A solid sequel that successfully replicates the first film's formula.

Franchise:

Under Siege (dir. Andrew Davis, 1992)

Under Siege 2: Dark Territory (dir. Geoff Murphy, 1995)

Under Siege (1992)

Director: Andrew Davis

Cast: Steven Seagal, Tommy Lee Jones, Gary Busey, Erika Eleniak, Colm Meaney

Country: United States

Rating: R

Run Time: 103 minutes

Alright. This blog is embarking into a whole new territory of action: Steven Seagal. To the average viewer, Seagal is synonymous with fat jokes and crappy DTV releases. The guy has starred in more DTV's than any other action star that I can think of. However, most people have never honestly seen a single one of his films. I'm not going to lie, I had never seen a single film of his from start to finish either. However, if I am going to be an action guy I have to dive into Steven Seagal films sooner or later. Therefore, I am choosing to start with his most successful film in order to give myself a taste of the best that the pony tailed man has to offer.

Casey Ryback. Akido master and ladies man.

Under Siege is as many critics have described as "Die Hard on a battleship." The film starts by telling us that a battleship is being transported to Hawaii in order to be disarmed so it can serve as a tourist attraction. During the transportation, Commander Krill (Gary Busey) plans a surprise birthday party for the captain of the ship. He chooses to fly in the party's entertainment in a helicopter consisting of a band led by Strannix (Tommy Lee Jones) and Miss July (Erika Eleniak). The battleship's head cook, Casey Ryback (Steven Seagal), is down in the kitchen cooking and preparing food for the ship. When he and Commander Krill get into a disagreement, Krill has him locked in the meat locker for insubordination. 

While Casey is trapped in the locker, Krill and Strannix take over the ship with the help of Strannix's men. They reveal their true intentions to be that they plan on stealing the ship's missiles and selling them off to the highest bidder. Unfortunately for them, they left Seagal down in the freezer and he is one pissed off ex-Navy Seal. The rest of the movie is Die Hard with Seagal snapping necks, breaking limbs, and shooting the crap out of some henchmen, all building up towards a final confrontation with Strannix himself.

Crazy Jones is in this movie.

Under Siege is probably the most widely recognized of all of Steven Seagal's films. Made on a $35 million budget, the film grossed a whopping $155 million, was nominated for two Academy Awards for Best Sound and Sound Editing, and ranks fresh on Rotten Tomatoes. No other Seagal film has ever come close to being as successful as Under Siege did. With this in mind, I went into the film with high hopes. Unfortunately, I found myself pretty disappointed.

Don't get me wrong. This is still an entertaining and solid action film. However, I never once felt any tension concerning whether or not Seagal would be able to stop the terrorists aboard the ship. He simply goes from set piece to set piece with no trouble whatsoever. The film really is a poor man's Die Hard. The lead hero and villain aren't as memorable as John McClane or Hans Gruber, the action is solid yet lacks the punch of Die Hard's set pieces, and the humor can't match up to Die Hard's many hilarious moments.

I know I am comparing this film to Die Hard and that some people find that unfair. But if you are going to rip off Die Hard, at least try to deliver a suspenseful thrill ride with actual tension. Seagal just wanders around the ship and slaughters bad guy after bad guy with no problem. Unlike the very human McClane, Ryback feels like an unstoppable killing machine. The film I watched did not feel like the most successful Steven Seagal film I have always heard of.

Oh yeah, Crazy Busey is in this movie too.

Seagal makes for an interesting action lead. I don't know why, but Seagal loves to whisper and talk softly when he delivers his lines. He also shows very little emotion or charisma beyond a smile here and a laugh there. It's just a Seagal thing I guess. I think I need to watch more Seagal films before I can give you an official opinion on the guy. He seems like a capable action star from the film I watched though. Seagal truly is an action movie fan's dream come true. He's an unstoppable killing machine and there is never a doubt in your mind that a film of his is going to deliver the goods.

I miss the days when Tommy Lee Jones was a crazed and energetic actor and when Gary Busey was actually in wide release films. If anything dates Under Siege (besides it starring a non-fat Steven Seagal), it's that Gary Busey and Tommy Lee Jones are the lead villains. The two basically try to out crazy each other throughout the film. Busey dances in drag in one scene and Jones literally snaps and mumbles nonsense in another. The two make for some extremely entertaining villains.

Miss July's (Erika Eleniak) hair style and presence also help date this film's 90's nature. She is found by Seagal knocked out on the ship. She than joins Seagal on his quest to wander around the ship and kill every terrorist he can find. Her character truly adds nothing to the film except sex appeal. There is a scene where the filmmakers unecessarily show off her breasts in a large close up and even have her and Seagal kiss at the end of the film. Like I said, sex appeal.

Miss July saves the day.

Under Siege at least has Seagal and his action prowress going for the film. Seagal's films are notorious for containing some of the most violent henchman dispatches in all of movie-dom. In the film's one hour and forty minute run time, Seagal hurls a knife into a henchman's neck, rips out a guy's throat, shoots numerous henchies in the head and chest, stabs a guy in the arm pit, kicks a guy into a saw blade, and drops a steel rod right through a guy's stomach. Talk about bang for your buck. Seagal puts on a real variety show if you ask me.

Of all of the action scenes in the film, there is a particularly great one around the middle of the film. Seagal crosses two sub-machine guns and rushes down a hallway filled with opened doors. As Seagal blind fires, he blasts all of the henchman standing in each door way. Pretty cool technique if you ask me.

There is unfortunately a very disappointing knife fight in the film. I'm sorry, but the editing and choreography of the final knife fight is just laughable. Nothing about it is exciting or visually cohesive. For a film filled with solid and entertaining action, it was quite disappointing to find a knife fight so poor.

Akimbo Seagal

Under Siege is my first official Steven Seagal action film. I think if you are willing to lower your standards, you'll have a real blast with this film. It's a load of dumb fun featuring an actor at the top of his game. After Under Siege, Seagal would never retain the same level of success. Therefore, the film literally marks Seagal at the top of his commercial game. Seagal is also an interesting action star. I'm not completely in love with the guy but I can see why others might like him alot. With some well paced action and some hilarious villains, Under Siege is good in my book.

Rating: 7/10 - This Die Hard rip-off is a flawed but solid action film. Recommended to action fans and general audiences alike.

Franchise:

Under Siege (1992, dir. Andrew Davis)

Under Siege 2: Dark Territory (1995, dir. Geoff Murphy)